Posted in perspective

The Infuriating Nature of Traffic

Traffic in Houston is terrible, just call me Captain Obvious, because clearly everyone knows this already.  I bring this up because I think it is evil too.  The drive time between work and my house is 45 minutes without traffic, or as everyone else in the country call it, a family trip.  At least I don’t have kids with me when I go to work, but that would just be icing on my rage cake.

In usual traffic it takes me about an hour and fifteen minutes to get between home and work.  I generally plan on leaving two hours, and every time I do, I end up having an hour to kill, because traffic somehow disappears into the ether. But if I don’t leave two hours early, everyone forgets how to drive a car, it rains, there are sixteen freaking accidents, a train or two, and every grandmother, grandfather and pot smoker decides they want to dive in front of me.  Notice I didn’t mention snow, so now I bet we will get one of those freak snowstorms tomorrow, in Houston “freaking” Texas.

I was on the express lane yesterday, and there was a school bus in front me, at 5 pm.  We also had the complete luxury of coming to a complete stop on the express lane, behind the bus, so there was no way to know what was going on.  Did we ever find out why we were at a complete stop?  Have you been reading this?  Because hell no, we never found out why, traffic doesn’t give you closure.  I am just imagining it was a band of soccer moms watching a soccer game in the middle of the highway.  At least that is good a reason to hate minivans.

And speaking of staring at crap on the highway, would people stop staring at accidents that are on another road and should by all logic, not impact the road I am on.  Whether the accident is on the other side of the highway going the opposite direction, or it’s on a cross street that is after the exit, these should not impact traffic.  So, stop staring and focus on the task at hand, because if you don’t your going to be in the next accident.  At least when I retire, I won’t have to worry about traffic anymore, because my old ass with be the grandpa causing it.

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