Posted in perspective

The Infuriating Nature of Traffic

Traffic in Houston is terrible, just call me Captain Obvious, because clearly everyone knows this already.  I bring this up because I think it is evil too.  The drive time between work and my house is 45 minutes without traffic, or as everyone else in the country call it, a family trip.  At least I don’t have kids with me when I go to work, but that would just be icing on my rage cake.

In usual traffic it takes me about an hour and fifteen minutes to get between home and work.  I generally plan on leaving two hours, and every time I do, I end up having an hour to kill, because traffic somehow disappears into the ether. But if I don’t leave two hours early, everyone forgets how to drive a car, it rains, there are sixteen freaking accidents, a train or two, and every grandmother, grandfather and pot smoker decides they want to dive in front of me.  Notice I didn’t mention snow, so now I bet we will get one of those freak snowstorms tomorrow, in Houston “freaking” Texas.

I was on the express lane yesterday, and there was a school bus in front me, at 5 pm.  We also had the complete luxury of coming to a complete stop on the express lane, behind the bus, so there was no way to know what was going on.  Did we ever find out why we were at a complete stop?  Have you been reading this?  Because hell no, we never found out why, traffic doesn’t give you closure.  I am just imagining it was a band of soccer moms watching a soccer game in the middle of the highway.  At least that is good a reason to hate minivans.

And speaking of staring at crap on the highway, would people stop staring at accidents that are on another road and should by all logic, not impact the road I am on.  Whether the accident is on the other side of the highway going the opposite direction, or it’s on a cross street that is after the exit, these should not impact traffic.  So, stop staring and focus on the task at hand, because if you don’t your going to be in the next accident.  At least when I retire, I won’t have to worry about traffic anymore, because my old ass with be the grandpa causing it.

Posted in current events

The Big Game

Today we have one of the largest sporting events in the United States (not the world, that goes to the other football, otherwise known as soccer). The San Francisco 49ers take on the Kansas City Chiefs, and if you are a fan of either team, sports can be like politics. I am a Steelers or Eagles fan, depending on whose doing better. When I said that to a Cowboys fan, it was like I was a democrat at an NRA convention.

Even though I am a fan of football, I can’t see getting upset when my team loses (of course with my teams I am just immune to disappointment anyway). But I see some people get really angry or sad when their team loses, no matter the league or sport. I always thought following sports was for entertainment, but if you take it so seriously, that it can make or ruin your day, is it really the escape it is supposed to be? Losing friends and family over something that doesn’t make much of a difference a week later just seems silly, it’s not like your loosing benefits or money (provided your not gambling on the game).

Of course I also can’t see spending the amount of money and time on going to a game either. I get wanting to spend time with friends and family, but all of the headaches of going to a game are just overwhelming for me. The tickets are expensive and so is parking, and what do you get for it, even if your on the field your never going to be able to see what they show you on television. I hate the traffic when I go to work, but going to sporting events makes rush hour traffic look like a Sunday afternoon drive (except when a sporting event is going on, obviously). Then there is the bathroom, watching the game at home, it is a short walk to the bathroom, and with a DVR, I can pause the game and rewind if I missed something. And the best part, it is free to stay home and watch. I know, someone is going to point out that there are ads, but remember I have a DVR, I skip most of those bastards, but I stop for the funny ones.

If you are staying at home to watch the Super Bowl it is another American holiday, complete with its traditional cuisine of pizza, wings, chips, soda, and beer. We hang out with our family and friends and have a good time, even when our teams aren’t playing in the game. It’s like Thanksgiving for sports. So everyone have a good Super Bowl Sunday, and may the best team win (since it isn’t the Steelers or the Eagles).